My Dad has an ancient phone, which only does calls and text messages. From time to time, we exchange text messages - often when I'm on holiday. Some of these seemed worth sharing…
Prague (Sept 2011)
- Arrived in Praha! Have I got everything? Luggage - check! Guide book - check! Currency - Czech! All OK then...
- If you made friends with the barman and played chess with him, would he end up as your Czech Mate?
- P.S. Thanks for sending your Czech Liszt earlier, but wasn't he Hungarian?
- Hope all is well and you are having a good day - Just Czeching!
- I assume that after your online passport date error, you had no problem at Luton Czech-in?
- Q. Why did the person from Prague make an appointment with the doctor?
- For a Czech up?
- When are you Czeching out of the hotel, why not ask if it is OK to pay by Czech.
- Q. Do you know why it takes ages to do your shopping in a Praha supermarket? A. Because there is always a queue at the Czech-out!
- Having had a Czech-ered few days (not really! Had a lovely time) it is good to Czech in to England. Now for a time czech ... One hour out! S
Spain (March 2012)
- Got here OK. Hotel lovely, hire car nice, weather completely balmy!
- Hello Muder, Hello Fader, We have made it, To Granada! Paid twice with plastic, Which sounds quite drastic, But it turns out the Alhambra is fantastic.
- Can't get enough of these Spanish castles. They're sooo Moorish!
- Gibraltar ROCKS!
- The 1527 Gibraltar earthquake: Rock AND Roll
- As the Fab 4 nearly once said: Back in the UK, Back in the UK, Back in the UKOK!
Battle (March 2012)
- Hear you are stuck in battle! Has your coach got an arrow in its headlight? S
- Moral - if you are going into Battle take an extra cohort or at least a squadron. Or a battery
- Was your Battlery flat?
Brussels (Sept 2012)
- Brussels bustles!
- Belgian's waffle!
- The hotel gym: muscles from Brussles!
- EEK! An E.E.C.
- In the spring, Brussels sprouts.
- 24/7 confectioners: Belgians choc' late!
- Belgian beer's bloody brilliant! But beware, Brussels' bistros buy boldly brewed beverages.
- Carillon up the Belfry!
- Visions of the future c1958, @ @omium.
Snow (Jan 2013)
- Don't worry if your photos come out in black and white
- Why? Cos neither Dunton, Bessels, Borough, or Green Street, are living up to their names. Don't tell me there snow snow in London
- Snow!!! Snow!! Snow! S'no joke!
Slovenia (July 2013)
- Ljubljana Tjubljana Threebljana Four
- This lake is Bleddy brilliant!
- Today I visited 3 countries in 3 seconds, and was chased through an electric fence by an angry cow! (Of the bovine ilk, one end moo, the other milk).
Florence & Pisa (Sept 2013)
- We're here! Easy-Pisa!
- Michelangelo painted tiny cherubs, or petit putti, as I call them.
- Pitti Palace cherubs: Pitti Putti!
- Sad cherubs: Pity Putti
- Try to handle one. Is it quite soft?
- Yes! Putti Putty
- Cherubic flatbread: Pitta Putti
- Cherub that used to be called Simon before renamed by Jesus: Peter Putti
- I was going to consider visiting Florence, but you are putti - ng me off.
- Cherubic cherubs: Pretty Putti
- Cherub sandwich: Putti Patty
- Cherubic crazy golf: Putting Putti
- Strokable cherubs: Petting Putti
- Small minded cherubs: petty putti
- Raving cherubs: Party Putti
- Toilet-training cherubs: potty Putti
Barcelona (March 2014)
- Barcelona: beautiful. Gaudi: genius. Catholic cathedrals: putting the 'mental' in ornamental.
- All Barcelona cathedrals do effectively favour Gaudi. However I just know, lately, many normal older people queued really slowly to understand very wierd xciting yellow zigzags.
- The long tall pointy things on top of the cathedrals are very inspiring.
- We jope you jave a jappy joliday.
Dubrovnik (March 2015)
- Hellfire & Dalmatian! I feel a week of Croatianism coming on.
- St Sebastian's leg: A gory leg Allegory.
- Is that history, or just his story?
Wimbledon (July 2016)
- I am ON THE CENTRE COURT!
- How the deuce did you get there?
- A tactical advantage?
- Balls, I'm running out of puns!
- It was a coach pick up but then it was ... A set down!
- Well de-served.
- Bored d'eau? Well drink wine then!
- Beware the Chateau - it's water from cats!
Where Am I?
- I can see the River Medway and Grain Power Station.
- Southend? Shoeburyneess? Canvey Island? Basildon even?
- They say that the best thing about Shoeburyness is that you can see the River Medway and Grain Power Station.
- I have been to Dunge, Black, Self-ritious, Inver, many times to Happy, to Loch, Drunken, Serious-ill, occasionally to Sad, Silly and Pointless, but NEVER to Shoebury!
- I cleaned my teeth today at 06.07 08/09/10
- Yesterday I had lunch at 12.34:56.7 8/9/10
- Hi, I just celebrated 20:10 20/10 2010!
- 11.01, 01/11/10
- It is now 11:11:11 11/11/11
- It is now 12.34:56.78 9/10/11
- Later, it will be 20.12 20/12 2012
- Now! 12.12 12/12/12
- Now!!! 21.02 21/12/2012
- Today is 9.11.13. I cant work out when will be the next day when the date will consist of 3 consecutive odd numbers
- It must be March 1st 2105. That is nearly 92 years away!
- It will soon be 08.09:10 11/12/13
- You beat me to it by an hour and a half
- Seconds count!
- 14.13:12 11/12/13
- 13.12:13 13/12/13
- Today is the feast of the Annunciation. So repeat after me, slowly and clearly, "HA-PPY BIRTH-DAY LIZ" [25 March 2015]
- 21 June 2015: Happy Fathers' Equinox! [Dad's birthday is 21 March]
- Today's date is 2²/2³/2⁴ [4 / 8 / 16]
- Today is a palindrome day: 6/10/2016
- Today I have been married for EXACTLY half of my life. [29/10/16]